Trans Identities
I didn't really understand the two groups of FPA mental states. Actually, reading further, I have no idea what this author is talking about (and I'm not even reading at night). It's so in such a passive voice. This "I want to go home" reference is too long and I'm pretty sure it's going to lead up to "choices" with trans people.
When guys do the whole “He tricked me! I didn’t know that was a really a man!” thing, I feel annoyed, as I'm sure a lot of us do. If a MTF has completed surgery too, they aren't a man! There's no deception there. There's nothing hiding physically, and the only argument they could possibly make is about something not physical. Like people for who they are. Even if they haven't completed their transition, a woman isn't seeking to trick anyone. It's just dumb.
"In my view, gender presentation literally signifies physical sex." This can be pretty true. I agree with it, with the exception of actual genitals present. If someone says they are a female/woman for gender, that's who they are by sex- I would treat them as that sex, but I'm just saying they may not have the "right genitals", but that doesn't disprove their gender/sex to me. The part where the author says " If it is true that transpeople who “misalign” gender presentation with sexed body are deceivers or pretenders, then those who “correctly” align presentation with body tell the truth. Thus, there is a representational relation between gender presentation and sexed body" gave only one way that there exists a relationship between gender and sex. This one is proved vaguely, but matches society, I suppose. I know people connect sex and gender, but why does everything have to be about right and wrong, correct or incorrect? People don't question other challenges in their life, they just accept it. If gender presentation symbolizes the "sex" of someone, then they're assigning a "genital status" to that individual, or at least with the claim that gender signifies sex.
Curiousity can be a bitch. Not only does it kills cats by the mass grave, but it hurts individuals in mroe way than one. Just asking “Have you had the surgery?” is a curiosity that can be so hurtful, but people want to know. It's an attempt to be polite to get to know, but asking nicely doesn't entitle you to know. Is it our business? Do we ask people who spent time with a guy get to ask "So, did you lose it?" in relation to the V-card? People do it, but it's not their business. Using surgery as a basis to represent someone as a man or woman shows how focused on gender our country is. You aren't "really" a man or woman until everything is complete. Then why do we still think after everything that they aren't "really a man or woman"? Or at least some people.
There's not really a way for the general population to know the culture, terminology, preferences, or lifestyle of those different from them- especially for transgender individuals. How would they know trans-friendly terminolgy and concepts? I myself have no freakign idea how to say things sometimes. I don't want to be offensive, but I want to be an ally. This class is helping, but it still follows the general population and our "extreme ignorance".
When I saw. " Yet rape is 'justified' in particular ways," I snapped with a huge "EXCUSE ME?" That's another topic on its own, and I don't know why the author brought it up if they hardly argued with or against it. Don't say something like that and so vaguely give information after. It doesn't let me know if I should give you brownie points or spite you.
Cis-Gender Privilege
I hung out with my two best friends over the weekend, and I tend to talk about this class. I also give my boyfriend, one of those best friends, crap jokingly about hos cisgendered and privileged he is, especially for being a middle class man. We all had serious talks about it along with other things during mini-golf, but it's incredible how much he has and doesn't realize it. We tried explaining things to him, and although I'm technically straights with a 2-2.5 on the kinsey, I felt I could add to the topic. I also remember the huge fights on tumblr last year about how "cis scum should die" and a few other violent implications made after one individual wrote about and posted a hateful text about cis gendered people. That post exploded with notes and there were fights all over the place. It's kind of dumb and counter-productive to actively hate cis-gender people. You can show them that they have more privilege, but you shouldn't tell them to all die.
But anyway, onto the reading.
When she was talking about masturbation, I remembered talking to those friends I mentioned earlier about how people even discover masturbation. Unless it's somehow taught, seen, or learned, people will in a young age probably have different ways of masturbating. (We're very TMI with each other). For example, laying on your hands and humping it if you're a guy, or a girl laying on her back and moving her leg a certain way. So, I think it would be easy for anyone to, cis or not, masturbate in a opposite gendered way.
As far as the author's problem with attraction at puberty, I wonder if it's at all ever the longing to be that sex that creates the attraction. A person only knows attraction by their own definition and feeling, so longing and sexual attraction may be different? I don't think this is really applicable to a lot of people, but it could be a common thing. I'm sure some doctors and therapists bank of this.
I really like the statement, "I now regularly experience what I consider to be the most important gender privilege of all: feeling at home in my own sexed body" and the discussion about 10 million dollars to transition. If it were cheaper and easily reversible, I think that she's right- more people would transition for a variety of reasons. People don't like change, though. That and the whole "body security" dilemma. I don't think it would be too hard for me to do that for that much money. My only problem really would be with the boyfriend. I already think androgyny is beautiful, and it would make me closer to that. But of course, all of this isn't on deep though and is possibly insulting. I just feel slightly more neutral about my gender, I guess.
I can see why Serano would dislike feeling a need to be a part of the trans community, but I don't see it as a bad thing that it exists. Sure, you don't feel that you should have to. I get that. That's okay. But you seem like it's a bad thing to have your own unique culture and lifestyle and she's focusing on why it exists in the first place instead- as if she's looking for the root of a problem rather than the budding flowers that may come with it?
I concept of "conditional cissexual privilege" to be interesting and believable.
I feel like going back and figuring out how to change my honors contract for you to include some word that could replace "biological" because now I can see as offensive or rude. Do I define "biological sex" in the paper? How would I define it? But my terms or what some online dictionary says? Is it important if we get the idea, but not specifics? The point but not the tangents? She makes a good point that I like about passing, where it has been made the minority's fault now. I don't like the concept, but it's a good point that it is "used to shift the blame away from the majority group's prejudice and toward the minority person's presumed motives and actions".
Serano's friend that has money hypersensitivity felt extremely similar to me right now. I've always been frugal and probably always will be. I was frugal before my mom lost her job and we had to cut on everything, and now it's even worse. I have extremely bad anxiety issues and panic attacks when dealing with money/costs in social settings, such as with friends splitting the check at dinner or my boyfriend treating me, because I can't just take it in myself. I can't control it, it just happens and I hate it about me. I feel guilty about spending it and it can make it physically feel sick at times. Where Serano is comfortable living in her body, I'm not quite comfortable with my end? We both seem to understand how easily something can be lost now though.
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